Well…updates

1. Team Beautiful Shadow update
2. Spazz
3. Holidays
4. CRPS
5. Broken bones (yep)
6. Family

SO… GREAT NEWS. Team Beautiful Shadow went from just me to a new group. We got Jessica, my cousin, who is going to school for BUSINESS as the NEW manager. We got a wonderful PR and fashion  person named Hope. We even got a girl named April who is going back to school for vet. Talk about an amazing change of pace. We’ve even broke down the necessary steps of what we need and how much we need and even what we need when. New things are beginning. We’ve began to look at horses. We even looked at a filly named Indy (we just decided she was too tiny for us) and a gelding named Thunder (bad back).

I ended up with Spazz in the breakup. Thankfully. She is a lot happier with me than trying to deal with cats who spray.

So…Halloween was nothing. Kids didn’t want to go out either. Thanksgiving was weird. I had been dating a guy named Mike (it was a weird boredom). I had my family dinner than work then a couple days later his family. He made me very uncomfortable that night. So…Christmas was great. Team party and family party. It was a long few days. I did nothing for New Years.

CRPS has been a bit different. It hasn’t spread or even got worse yet. So I’m taking advantage of it.

So in August 2019, I had the metal removed from my elbow. It had shifted so it was needed to be gotten rid of. But in the beginning of Janurary 2020, I broke my left middle finger. Not thrilled.

Oh boy

So, I am stuck awake again. 1/2 good 1/2 bad.

Bad half first: telling my team manager we’re switching gears….AGAIN. I hear this argument in my head already. Beating head on pillows already.

“Why?”

“Can’t stop thinking about it, can’t stop dreaming about it. So fuck it. Let’s do it.”

“Why?”

Joy for that conversation later today. *hits face with pillow again* But she is coming over with the knowledge that I have been thinking about something the last few days so fingers crossed it doesn’t turn side ways. *hits face again* I’d scream into pillow but I have sleeping family members and fiance so not waking people up at 5 am when they don’t need up. Screw that.

So the Good half: I’ve been taking “Laws Of Abundance” classes for a few days and since I did, I feel more relaxed and back full of hope. Ha ha ha ha ha. No seriously. Getting denied for a new vehicle was a big kick to the ass. We need a new truck….before snow flies. Living in the north is a BITCH for snow. But I am filling a notebook full of notes from the classes and each page is full of advice or an exercise to work on.

So yep, brain is running on ENERGY. Which means I no sleep. Insomnia is a BITCH but I’m using it to my advantage instead of watching random ass videos…I’m watching my lessons. *hits head with pillow* I want sleep. Sorry rambling is what happens when running on 4 hours of sleep for 3 days.

I was a skeptic and still am a skeptic as I take these classes but what’s the worst that can happen? Honestly. Nothing. So time to study and study and study and study…and study….oh boy.

So I guess I am okay with how today is gonna go. Physical therapy followed by some conversations could end well…or could end in an arguement. Coin flip. *shrugs* wish hitting head with pillow helped brain shut off but here we are staring at the laptop getting things done. I am a fucking…whatever doesn’t sleep creature.

So final thoughts:

Study anything that sounds weird to you. You might be surprised by what you find.

A decision on the future

I love rodeo but I love horses and cats more. So after a long weekend of talking. I mean LONG weekend of talking, it has been decided.

Some how in the next 5 years we are going to be opening as a team (myself, my fiance, and our team manager Autumn) a horse rescue with cats, dogs, and ferrets. Animals we all know very well.

Autumn would focus on the dogs. She is a great trainer and handler (plus I am not the biggest fan of dogs). She has experience with dogs of all sizes and that is where she will strive.

Ashley would focus on the cats and ferrets. She has a passion for cats and ferrets plus has had experience with handling both since her mom raised ferrets for a few years. She doesn’t mind the extra work.

Me? Horses of course. My dream has always been to open a rescue and prove that second chances are the best ones. I have more than 20 years experience with horses of all ages, disciplines, and sizes. I also will dable in the cat area since I love working with animals no one else can get near.

So how do we plan to make money in a rescue? Simple. Restaurant. It’s been a big goal also to run a restaurant/bakery with recipes and prices everyone can afford. Blah blah blah, no money in it. Lies! A restaurant in my home town still has the original prices I can remember. A coney-$1.50, fries- $2.25. Those prices include tax. So no hidden fees. It’s a fun place to eat and the workers make you feel at home. They’ve been open a 100 years. So, obviously it works.

Our big focus that all 3 of us really have is on DRAFT horses. We all love them and find so many people fear them for no reason. I personally can tell you minis are a bigger pain in the ass than a Percheron.  We really want to change the way people see animals.

There will be adoptions and fostering eventually but at first we just want to get these animals restarted and happy. This came after what should have been heart break. I sold my beloved Shadow last week for $100. The price I paid for him. But there was a reason. Something in me said it was okay. A little girl was begging for him and paid me in what was obvious saved money. They picked him up at 9 pm and the rest was history. They are happy and he has a little girl who can give him what he desires.

So for me. The fees will vary depending on animal and if we will have to deliver or not but that is details we are working out on paper first. I will of course do home checks on the horse farms because horses are a much bigger issue vs say cats or dogs. People can handle them much easier.

But for now, I have to get through all the doctors and start the planning. We aren’t sure what state we are going for (either Tennessee or Kentucky or Michigan). I have to see 2 doctors Thursday just to see what the next step is in my recovery. I will ride again. I swear to it.

So the blog may shift to the journey we are going to go through for the rescue.

Ashley Hendricks

Above: black shirt is Ashley with her mom and friend.

Ashley has been my friend since the end of 7th grade. I still remember our friend, Hailey drug her to my table. I had sat on my first day at the new school. She has been a blessing since.

She went away to college for culinary. She loved every moment. We had a couple fights during her college time but we made up not long after. She came back and we’ve been together since. She lived with her mom on a farm with a few different horses. She was never happy.

Her with her college friends heading to a party. Everyone of them had made her life at college the best experience.

She has been helping me with everything since she I broke my collarbone. She made sure I had popcorn chicken and coffee when I needed it (that was all I wanted after surgery). She gave me no complaints.

When I got seziures she understood my new issues and listened to what was necessary for her to do if I had one. She stayed by my side. The worst part: when I was walking I had a mini seizure in the middle of the road and broke my elbow, she blamed herself for not catching me. I never blamed her. I was ahead of her. She took care of me again while I recovered from that surgery.

 

The pictures of the last few years. She got a tribal cat tattoo to show her personality on the outside. Her at the cement park we got to go in 2016. The other one was her favorite picture of herself with her hair having a good day.

She has learned to love Shadow. She refuses to let me give up on my dream. No matter what happened. She was the one who found out the black part of my big toe was just blood. She cleaned it and helped my nail heal. She picked up hours at work to cover the problems we were having due to my injuries. She currently isn’t expecting me to go back to work until I am 100% ready.  She doesn’t expect me to over work my leg or arm. She does what I need and I do what I can for her.

She is my fiance. I love her. We’ve been together for 2-3 years officially. We get asked all the time when are we getting married. She said when we are ready it will happen. She reminds me that I can do it. My pain is passable.

 

She was sharing music with Shadow as I got ready to grab his equipment bag on the other side of the fence. This was 2016. She has been helping with him. They get along and he is the first horse she loved. She is afraid he’ll step on her but she never leads him so she has an easy understanding.